a Brake to Bitch

Yeah... I like to do this a lot, jump if not into me.

I have just noticed, that I haven't read a book in eight days, though I have bought, or gotten - what? five more. That’s shit; I can see that, I know.

tonight, or this avo, I'm going to start one, though I'm not all that sure what I want to pick up and read (a YA or Adults, hard to decide) I find that I am able to write more of my own books when I read a YA novel, maybe because my line works with it. maybe because I'm arigent enough to think I can do better (though I know I can't) but whatever it is, it works and so really, on that I should read a adults novel, get them out of the way so that all I have left are the YA ones and then I can kick it all off finishing this first first draft of mine (it's got to be done by mid Oct, cause I want to be able to print it out and take in on holidays with me and fix it up on my down time. the nights sitting in the open with nothing to do. to me it's either that or read. and well... I'm doing that one know. Also I find I can put my own books down a lot easier than I can another’s. 

But still.... it doesn't at all tell me what the hell I should read. and that's mostly because there's so many I want to but I don't want the book to shift over to tomorrow, I don't have my kids and so it's the day things get done, but not if all I want to do is snuggle up with a book. So it's got to be short - which heads me over to YA. And the ones I don't think I'm going to like all that much, since when you don't particularly like a book, well you guys now.. 

Anywho. I have written 3 pages and a bit of my YA story I've been working on. I'm up to 67pp (a4, single) and getting to a point that I can start getting her out of there, that's cool. Well, it is if you can get in the right mind space and can think of how it's going to work, me not all that great on that one. Honestly it's getting annoying, really is. Why can’t it just come, and when it does most of the time I don’t like what I have written in the first place. Which shouldn’t matter all that much at the moment, I just want the book finished so that I can go through and fix it up, make it what I really want it to be.

Though saying all this, the reason that I think I haven’t been able to write is because I was going somewhere that I wasn’t liking only way at the back, and that part of me doesn’t like to clue me in on that sort of crap until it’s sure of how to fix it. Really it’s like... I’m on total writers block until my mind tells me the write way and then, BAM, the flood gates open and I don’t have the time to sit and write. It’s shit and annoying, not that I’m thinking like that at the tie, all I have is, ‘Yeah, that’s what’s meant to happen, can’t wait till I’m writing it.’ I also think that I like the idea of me not being able to write it straight away, especially if it’s about the plot not the word to word (they normally come of a night when I’m trying to think) so it’s better for me to think it threw, or let it stick, it’s the only way to knows it’s the right way to go, if you forget anything then it’s not worthy of a book, but if it sticks, and grows. Then you know its right, and also, with me, it gets all wrapped around your brain and you never forget it. It’s how you can write and write and write and never forget your place, ‘cause if you forget something about your book it’s not worth your time. Think of something else, or a different character or something. You shouldn’t forget what you’re writing, or who you’re writing.

Anywho, it’s not really like I know what I’m talking about. Though I think I do it’s not like there’s any proof that I can actually write a book in the first place. At least not one that is worth anyone reading it.

So book to read.... I really want to read Wild Fire – at least that’s what I’m really thinking about reading. But I think maybe Spellbound or... Past Midnight might be the one for tonight.