Sunday, 18 September 2011

Let's Talk Nothing


It's not that hard for me to do

So I wrote half of my short story the other day, Saturday actually, it's the short story that's coming up next month, it also came to my attention that I'm crap at not write shit on this. like really, I write a short story and it's only up, or at least on the Home for like two or three days, so now, it's going up for a week, which means you have a week, and probably no longer to read it. 'cause let's face it I love to write crap. 

so anyway, in one sitting I write 6 pages, it isn't that great, really, they aren't, just a story for you all to read something that shows I'm a writer - since for some reason I can't seem to call myself a author when I haven't anything published, and a lot of you probably agree that I'm not 'cause of that same reason, but I have heard people call themselves authors before they are one, because that's what they want to be. 

and I really want to be one, doesn't mean that I'm going to become one, and therefore I can't call myself an author when I'm not published, so I'm a writer, not that I would even call myself that to someone else. nah, I'm just a housewife - ha, wouldn't even do that one, even though, technically I am one, I stay home clean, look after the kids and cool dinner more times than I don't. That’s the definition of a housewife isn't it? The only difference with me is that I'm not a wife, nor will I ever become one. Just thinking about walking down an aisle...shivers up the spin, just thinkin' bout it, and that's cool, I just don't like the whole centre of attention and all that. I could just down to the court house, but my partner would wont his parents there, and then mine would want to as well, and, yeah, the same as before.

My idea of getting married? (And this would only work if I lived in the USA but I don't, sigh) is getting maggoted and saying 'I DO' to an elves impersonator, or you know, whoever the hell is there. Really, that's my dream. Or at least the one I have now, before was different... and pointless to you all, cause really you don't care about me and marriage, do you?

I was hoping that I would be able to finish my short story tonight, but I tried and started reading it - you know, so that I could finish it off. And I just couldn't.... 

So here I sit, looking at other blogs, reading what they have to say from the last couple of days, fixing up things on this blog. There isn't much, I'm on here way too much. But it's going to change, though really, it's not like I can really help a lot of things. But school holidays is coming up. And my kids are going to have a week off their respected schooling (preschool, family daycare) and I have that week, and the time that comes up, to get my daughter to use the toilet, she just doesn't want to. She’ll pee anywhere else, but the toilet, as soon as I ask her to, or make her, she'll hold it in until she's in pain from needing to pee. it's horrid, and I can't do what I did with my son - bribery, yeah, he caved, and my daughter wont, I'm not sure if this is a good thing or a bad one, for either of my kids. But there you have it. She’s too old to still be in nappies (nearly 4) and I won’t her out of them before we head on holidays, really, how much better would it all be if she didn't use them. 

So though I normal don't tell you this crap - mostly because I write the story in the week that I post them, but this short story is about Hell, and falling in love (yeah, it's what's happening), or more so lust. I started writing it in-between book 1 and book 2 of the personal demons series, the one that I didn't like all that much and so I wrote a story, it was either that or let my mind create a series from it. And I really don't want that. Heaven and hell are something that I have problems writing about. mostly because when you go into that you go into the bible and God and the devil and that's something all together different and something I can't... well, it's not about my believing or not, and I'm going to get into my beliefs on this, but I don't like that book (the bible) I don't believe in the bible, and if you want to go write into that shit, you kinda need to get to know it a bit, and I can't... even for a book, so I leave it alone and go into all that threw different religions. I just can't.... I have deep feelings about That Book, and I'm never going to write about them. But there there and I can't read it, can't learn the finer dealings of it. I tried and it just pissed me off so much I--yeah, not going there so I'm going to stop here before I say (write) something I can't take back but would wont to.

So this isn't at all what I wanted to talk about, but there you have it anyway, I can't remember what the original idea was. So... (and so you know, this is how my stories are like too, I have an idea, have something I would really like the book/story to be like, but it comes out the way it does and yeah, that's evident in the last story that I wrote, I wanted it to have love, yes, but also hatred, pain, longing, hopelessness. it's now Lust. all about lust. how pathetic is that. 

Good night/morning/mid day/afternoon... wherever you are, whenever your reading this, thanks for your time