Wednesday, 18 June 2014

Just Words for Words Sake

Too much running not enough writing
That seems to be how my days have turned out over the last two weeks.
I’ve gone into total meltdown, calling myself names that I didn’t need to hear. Letting it all get to me without a reason, and bam, clarification. There isn’t a reason…
I’m not wonder-woman, I never have been, and quite honestly, I never want to be.
I’ve had big, loud, over the top, opinions I don’t need to even bother with. I didn’t even need to read, or to have a say. Why should it even matter to me? But it some of the comments that have come off the topic have hit nerves with me I haven’t been able to stop thinking about. Stop ranting at inside my own head.
I’ve had a personal matter thrown in my face. I don’t like being called a lie when I haven’t been lying. Okay, I don’t like being called one when I have been, but when I haven’t…
I don’t like having to have a person bitch at me over the phone because they have decided things I never gave them licence to do.
I hate being blamed for things that aren’t my fault and then told I have this many days to clean it up.
I hate that things keep piling on top of me and I can’t seem to climb out.
But on an upside, because the down one to this will clear itself out, it always does. I got a slow cooker for my birthday and so I’m looking forward to all the fun I can have with that.
And on the writing note, well, I still have bits coming in from Moonlit Wolves 7, which will always happen, I’m like a quarter into that book, and I want to write it, I just don’t want to be under so much pressure as I do it.
And I know it’s all my own, but pressure from me is worse than from another. I just hope now that I’ve let myself write it as it comes (which is unfortunately the way my head works best) I will have an even better book, because I won’t be rushing to get it out. No, I’ll be able to take my time, make sure it sits in the level of the last book, and that both the characters are who they are, and how I want them to be seen.
My horror short story is also in the works, I’m either getting lines from book 7 or this one, and I’m so excited and scared as all hell to write it.
It’s not a pun, if that was a pun, more that I’m not sure if I’ll actually be able to pull it off, and have it what I want it to be, because…
Well, it’s horror, and on a lot of levels I know I can do that, but I also have a mean arse twist at the end that will have you looking back at the book in a different light. If done how I want it down it will be fucking awesome, and I think, maybe, more so because I’m keeping it quite short, simple.

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