My Outside, My Inside
Published 10 of Jan 2015 by
BonyDee Press
6,211 words (37p)
Sci-Fi flavoured Romance
“You left me!” he screamed.
Driven crazy from a childhood
abduction, Mike has moved from mental institution to institution, all in the
hopes of allowing him to forget his past, but little do his family and doctors
know, he’s abductor wasn’t from this world, and he’s always planned on coming
back.
Amazon ǀ ARe ǀ Smashwords
If you have downloaded this
book before this day, please delete and re-download as it had major problems I
have fixed. This isn’t to say I think the story is perfect, but it’s a lot
better put together then the original
Excerpt
The
most beautiful sight in the world stared back at Mike as his breath caught at
the view before him.
He
couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing, couldn’t get his mind to process the
reality of what was really happening, not with an awe-inspiring sight. Not when
his eyes watered a gentle weep that didn’t quite escape his lids at such a
spectacular vision.
Darkness
outstretched his eyes capabilities, as colours swirled and turned, a solid form
like a cloud up in the day sky. Mike could tell it was distance that made the
dance stand still, that if they’d got close it would be nothing more than junk
shifting around them, but it didn’t take away from the sight, not for one
minute.
Sparks
tinged in the distance, flashing by so fast he couldn’t follow – a shooting
star that was waiting to be caught, if only he had the reflexes. He would have
wished if he could think of anything but soaking in this one moment, because he
knew it would end. He knew something would come and take him away from the
fantasy he was clearly caught in, but he wasn’t going to rush it. It wasn’t
like there was anything left outside of this he wanted to revisit. No family or
friends that he’d be lost without.
Hell,
he was sure his parents would rest easier if he never dirtied their doorstep,
or try and convert their perfect son, his younger brother, with his talk of
space and aliens that both terrified Mike and soothed.
They
hadn’t wanted him back; they’d have wished him dead at the hands of his
abductors, over what they got back. At least, that’s what he’d been feeling,
but the doctors had told him that it was natural, that feeling of abandonment.
They’d locked him up, and left him there, and he was allowed to be angry at
that, he was allowed to feel hurt.
Yet,
it hadn’t really been like that, had it. He’d been a danger to himself and
others around him, he needed help that his parents couldn’t give him, no matter
how hard they had tried. They had visited, four times a week, moved when
doctors had recommended a different facility that had world-renowned doctors
who could help him, who would make him be able to get back into the world.
So
where’d the abandonment come from? It hadn’t been from them, he’d never felt
anything but love from them. Love and sadness as he collapsed deeper and deeper
into his delusions. Even as he thought bad things about them—even at his worst,
his subconscious would always pipe up and tell him what he needed to hear, the
reality of the world around him and the love he had gotten from his parents,
that he still had, was real and untainted.
Yet,
the fact that he still felt as if something major was missing from him grew
stronger and stronger as the years dragged on. It had gotten to the point, or
was getting to the point that he’d end himself soon. Not being able to deal
with the loss and grief that were eating him up and making him this pathetic
crazed version of a man he’d never been allowed to grow to be.
Maybe
that’s what he was experiencing now? Maybe this was life after death.
Mike
didn’t know how long he sat there for, just looking into the abyss, thinking
about his life, contemplating nothing, while reliving moments that meant
everything to him, as it stood for nothing.
Whatever
he was in seemed to be moving, shifting against time and… well, space in a way that made no sense to
Mike, and yet clearly was a forward motion. Colours and shapes came into view
and moved away at a steady pace, giving him time to take his feel, love and to
grieve a moment as it started to disappear into nothingness, like all things
did when they weren’t in your line of sight.
Something
itched at Mike’s shoulder blades, he wasn’t sure what it was, and even as he
thought about the weirdness of the feeling, he was sitting up straighter,
looking around, and catching the eyes of a massive—
“Holy
fuck!” he startled at the sight of…of… he wanted to say man. Mike wanted to
call him a man more than anything else in the world. His mind latched onto it,
made it all make sense while he knew it didn’t, because even though it had
similarities to his own self, what he was looking at couldn’t really be a man
at all.
Tall
wide and a weird brown red tone colour, his anatomy was trying hard to be human
like, and it was failing in all sorts of ways Mike wasn’t sure he could ever
truly describe, not with his own mind latching onto the part of him that was
the same as himself and making the rest just… fit.
It
had two arms and two legs, and the way he stood there staring back at Mike, in…
well, Mike wasn’t sure what the look was, and he wasn’t sure if that was because
of the odd shaping of his angular face or the colouring. Or he’d never seen
that look directed at him before which meant he couldn’t name it. Maybe all
three, it had him feeling oddly uncomfortable, in a way that had him moving
closer, when he should be moving away. Had his body heating up and his clothing
feeling a little too tight for his body.
Mike
wanted to rub up against the man, and he’d almost convinced himself he wasn’t
really here enough that he’d be willing to crawl over to the… man, and give him
everything he wanted.
That
strong chest rose up, widening in a way that chests just didn’t do where he was
from, and yet he was already starting to get used to it, even if he’d never
seen anything like it before.
That
body seemed to shutter in on itself as it looked at Mike, taking him in, he
believed, but Mike wasn’t sure in what way.
“Who
are you? Where am I?” Mike said, his voice soft, insecure around this massive
beast of a man. He was hoping it was self-preservation making him sound so
small and not a number of other possibilities, but he was afraid he’d
completely, utterly lost his mind.
The
giant turned his head to the side, a cock of his chin, Mike thought the
movement was called, but he wasn’t really thinking about the grammar or his
thoughts, when in front of him stood something so utterly terrifying from both
the size of him and the amount of lust that his presence was shooting though
Mike.
His
gesture was soothing, so familiar, allowed Mike to see him more as a human than
whatever he was, but as soon as he took a step forward, one large arm coming
forward, reaching for Mike, he cringed back, falling off the bed he’d been
sitting on.
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