She is just so beautifully hot, and every feeling that concerned her wrapped itself around his lust and fuelled it into a need so strong Jo had trouble thinking straight around her.
Body of Darkness, b1, page 35
Words to begin with: So, I went on a week’s hiatus because...well, I just...I just can’t at the moment. I struggled all week with trying to put anything in my head onto paper, and it just didn’t want to go. (Saying this, most of what I wrote, in the beginning week, is actually from a week ago. The crap I add on about the books is actually what happened this week. I didn’t write anything in that week. Nothing! Keep in mind while reading this).
So back to the grind stone. Ha, like I don’t enjoy this..?! It just sometime feels like work, and that sucks balls to a point of people wondering where the rash came from.
Sun: the topic of gay people in books, as they are, not coming out, or realising, but gay in a way that’s all about them being comfortable with what they are.
A novel about them being like everyone else in any other novels.
I get this, I think it should happen to, but the thing about this being in a YA is that the coming out is a huge deal and it’s a deal that needs to have been said. I think, it’s why you don’t have that in YA, you can’t...
Okay, it’s more for the fact that a YA book is generally written for a person of 12—16 which, well, isn’t that the time that you realise this? That you get to an understanding with your sexuality on what’s what and what’s gonna get you off?
I agree that gay main characters should be there, they should be strong in themselves, and they should be treated as if what they are is what they’ve always been. Hell, I’m writing one sorta like that, though it’s Romeo and Juliet to the point that they’ll both be dead by the end of the tale. Yeah I’m slack but it’s what’s gonna happen so deal with it...
(saying this, the novella on this blog the main character on that was meant to kill himself too, but that didn’t happen because I thought....yeah, anyway I didn’t kill him off when I was meant to and he’d died a good fun way, even had it written out how she was going to find him and everything, but that didn’t happen, so maybe this wont either—
And now I’m getting off topic).
I think with YA people get caught up with the whole finding yourself when they are writing the story. At the end of the book there main character has to be the woman/man that’s he’s going to be for the rest of his/her life. And he/her is going to get slammed with everything we (if unlucky) get slammed within our whole lives. and unfortunately that means that when you are thinking ‘gay’ you think, coming out, because it’s the hardest thing they have to deal with at this point in their life—generally the point of age that they are in YA novels.
What I would like, and something that I would read, is a YA series with a gay main character, because, really, how long can you pull out ‘coming out’, and it can’t be the main point for the whole series, can it? Pretty lame one if you ask me. But it would also force an author to think about normal shit that everyone goes through and therefore, making the story what every other one is.
Now I hope you don’t read this a feel that I’m being hateful, really I’m trying not to, but it’s a point that I feel....
Well, I just don’t see sexuality as being anything. I don’t care what you fuck or what you want to fuck (okay, babies and animals, I can’t do, babies because, well, sicko, and animals, same reason but I’ll take the ‘just don’t spill that shit’ take on it).
I’m the type of person that, well, I just don’t care, I think the world would be less fucked up if we just treated it like we treat a male and female getting it on.
Really people, who cares, it ain’t like there trying to hump your leg in the middle of the street, honestly a gay person will back off if they realise you’re not into them just like a straight one will (yeah, okay, bad reference, because some don’t, I know). I just don’t get what the big deal is, really? What is the big deal?!
There just people living there lives in a way that’s their own and why not let them, they let you, don’t they? you can’t preach about being a free country if your also spilling your shit about same sex marriages, really, you know what makes something free, being about to live your life the way you wish, not some fuckwit next town over who doesn’t know you for shit.
I’m all for eating what you want, fucking what you wish (no, really, not babies, children, your own or family, or animals, none of them can give you consent. People, no means no, no matter when it’s said, and if they can’t, then don’t fuck it at all, that’s just not right). Feel the way you want to feel and live the way that makes you happy, everything will work itself out even if ya gotta get a second job to help with that happiness.
Now that I’ve said my bit (I have more, but it’s much of the same, I like to talk, especially about something I’m right with (happens less then I want to admit, I don’t usually make sense)) I’ll leave you with the nothing that I’ve done today.
Really, I’ve just jotted down a few notes with both book 6 (about a sex scene that would work and be cool if it happened that way) and book 8 (with the points of arraigned marriages and what I should look into, with some specifics. As well as a novella idea of the wedding, just cause it will make me put more effort into the whole thing, and hey, if you guys actually like my series, wouldn’t a novella of the wedding be cool?!)
Okay, today: I wrote 761 words on Body of Darkness
Started book 8.5 Sexual Darkness, 250 words
I also changed around the numbers on the books, since the novellas aren’t really a book and yet I’ve been holding them as one. This came off me putting in another novella it’s undetermined if it’s a full of a novella but it’s a story that’s been there a long time and will, in later series be added to two already together.
Anyway, my series at the moment:
0.1: Beauty of Summer, 1: Body of Darkness, 2: Destiny’s Hands, 3: Betrayal and War, 4: Obsessive Lips, 4.5: [unnamed], 5: Cursed Happiness, 6: [unnamed], 7: Third Wheel Heaven, 7.5: (the wedding), 8: Seductive Timing, 8.5: Sexual Darkness,
(that’s the series at the moment, I know there are a lot of novellas but they will make sense and they are all added to stories, either making them make sense—a beginning if you will. or a ending to a book that just didn’t work in the book.)
Started up a new book, surprise, yeah, I’m getting over myself to. anyway, it’s a human monster story (so novella style) called Hunting You Lover... and I just started it up, getting the drift of what the character sounds like. I wrote 2,089 words.
Tue: I didn’t really do anything today, because, well, I went out and got some fresh air and by the time I got home family life hit hard and I was busy.
I did however, get in a bit of light reading (which is what I’m calling, reading one of my own books—fixing it up a bit, and this one needed fixing)
‘Wolf Fights’ is the book I was fixing up. Something that’s changed more times that you needed too, and yet it’s this one that I like, a short story of plays with the two main characters as the commentary. I really like it. Like the way it’s going to go, though I’ve started it as a YA book it might not stay so young, because things I want to happen between them, things that were always going to happen but I think they should become clearer.
Wed: it’s been a long time since I got this obsessed over something.....
I’m talking Heaven Sent, honestly I can’t stop reading the books that I have, it’s getting to a point, that even though I got the 2nd book on Monday I know what pages all the good shits on, and don’t get me started on the 1st.
It’s a usual thing for me to get obsessed with things. It’s what I do. It makes this whole writing thing odd, because I’m still completely into it. I love writing stories, even if no one will ever read any of them. But we’ll see, next year, I’ll actually try (and get the rejection letters)
Still, I can’t believe how obsessed I am with these books. honestly, and this is just what’s popped into my head while write this, it’s like when I started reading One Piece, that’s the type of funk in my head this books set in me. It’s why I’m having trouble getting my foot back into this story, maybe I should write more on last week’s book and call this another brake?!
Aha, well, we’ll see how things pan out tomorrow....
521 words Body of Darkness
· I finally figured out why I’m having blockage—yeah, it’s got to do with my fucked up head and its need to dip me into a depression, but I caught it at the beginning so I couldn’t even use that to write a story. and it’s also got something to do with the fact that it’s killing me to wait so long for books that I need now (at least one! plz come soon!!!)
· But it’s just come to my attention, as I tried in vain to write at least a thousand words (well, it was more, trying to push my page numbers up to 40, since I push page numbers not word count.) that I don’t know what’s going to happen. And not in a way that’s good, that I have when I start out, but I have no idea on where they’re going, not really, what they’ll see or any of that crap, and being that they are in the Underworld at the moment, it’s become very clear that I actually have to come up with this shit before I can write about it. I have to know, at least a little bit, about where they need to look first, at who they should meet, even shortly to push them in the right direction.
· I’m screwed at the moment because I can’t figure out these details at the moment, and so that’s the whys of such little writing this week.
Thur: is it wrong for me to be intimidated about writing a sex scene? A sex scene in a way that isn’t what I like, what I feel?
I know at the end of the day it’s all about me writing it and hoping for the best. I’m sure I do okay, but reading other people, the way they write, it’s intimidating to write one....more so than I ever thought it would be.
Saying this, I don’t generally write full-out scenes with the first draft—hell I don’t really put that lust aspect into it all that much threw the first draft, only when it’s needed and with the second draft the intensity of it becomes twice what I originally put in. the first draft is nicely plan, mostly the parts I really want in there. This saying if I end up writing an actual sex scene in the first draft it’s because that scene is a must no matter the personality.
Since you never get the full personality of you person first time wound, it’s to fucked up and pieced to see everything they are, at the end, you know, and you can go back and make that part stick, letting them grow the way they should due to their personality.
(at least I don’t, I don’t figure out my characters that indebt while writing, it’s more a game that I play with them, which is also why I always have two drafts and the first is generally never complete, just notes of parts and the bits that are already in my head, the parts there screaming at me to get out. the rest...the timing, space, all comes in second drafting when I got to where the person going and what they’re seeing. It’s easier and you don’t have to research and work out an entire world at once, just the gist, unless you need details. It makes paranormal words easier to manage—just remember to always not what you’ve worked out, as detailed as you can, though remember to mention whose personality are seeing this place, ‘cause everyone sees things differently, you have to understand that, no one sees the same place the same way).
Weekly Re-cap: it’s become painfully obvious that I’m having a blockage. Yeah, me! I’m at the point where there isn’t much more I can do but sit myself down and have a good long talking too.
I just can’t write. I can’t think of anything new to put down on a book that I know how it’s ending, and that’s the thing. I haven’t got a thought on how I get to the next level, how to move them, where they have to go, and what they where they have to go.
Hell, I can’t even put in the additional characters rolls, the ones that is going to fully let this story link up to the next.
I’m in a block, and I think it’s because I’m too excited about reading the piles of books that I have to read, so on this note I’m going on hiatus. I don’t know how long this will be going for; mostly I’d say a week, maybe a fortnight, mostly because I generally can’t go that long without writing.
I will however be posting a few other ‘first 3 chapters’ of two of them being the books that I have already writing, book 1 & 2 of Teen-Hunt series and I’ll put them up for you to read.
Words count for the Week
2,089: in a new story
521: in book 1
“Not really, you could just not touch a person and not have this smell attached to you, since it’s noticeable even when you’re away from them. Everyone that comes near us will know where we’ve been, but it’s still all guess work for them.”
Body of Darkness, b1, page 36