Saturday 29 September 2012

Memoirs of this Delusional Writer #7

Starting paragraph
And that’s when all hell broke loose.
Body of Darkness (Brethren Warrior #1), page 23
Words to begin with: starting note: I have done my ‘Book Shelf’ again, the photos aren’t in it, but I’m having trouble deciding how I’m going to do that, also I need to link everything up, but, check it out....

Okay. So this week we are showing a special. We are going to go through the steps that I take when I am doing a...well, this time; it’s a finish, and re-write.

            Book name: Body of Darkness
            Series: Warrior Brethren (This World That World Universe)
            Book: 1
            Word Count: 34,358

Okay, so first up, I printed out what I already wrote. Which is 50 pages. I find it easier to have a form I can hold and write over. this is just me, I’m not great with words and shit like that so it’s easier and I get less frazzled if I’m able to change things and see things in a hands on form.

Then, I put what I originally had in a different file (I name it Cut and Paste) this one is so that I don’t physically have the writing on the same page I’m about to re-write it. I find that I don’t miss anything if start at the beginning and work my way through paragraph/chapter at a time.
I’m also a bit anal, and I keep every paper (electronical) part of my stories. So I have this one stapled and the date in which I’m doing this read-threw is dated and will only be done in this colour once. So I can keep track of where I changed things. (Like I’ve been saying I’m odd.)

Okay, so then I go through the pages. I know that the Prologue (2,014 words) is where I want it to and I’ve gone over it a lot of time, so it’s good. Which means it gets cut and pasted into the main file.
Also, while we are at it. I have just recently re-wrote chapter 1 (2,897), because of my thinking about it going into the contest. So that’s another cut and paste up and running.
So those two are done.

Alright, chapter 2 needs a re-write: It’s a sex scene that’s full of magic and it’s got everything that I need in there. It’s one of the first scenes that came into my mind about the book. It’s actually the base line of the two main characters, but its voices aren’t what they should be. So this is a one that has to be re-written.
(2,528 2,247 words)

Chapter 1 (aka3.) has been nearly written, but this one needs information dumped into it. (2,450 words)
Chapter 2 (aka4) is done. It’s new, just cut and paste. (5,000 words), I should maybe spilt this into two chapters, but that will have to be figured out when I write up a...hang on. A thought!
If I do that, which I’m thinking will come up when I do a sweeping read (I put in a star so I know where it will happen) the top chapter will have 2,527 words, the bottom, 2,748.
Chap 2: 2, 252. Chap 3, 2,748
Chapter 3 (aka5) needs to be wrapped up, with a few key points that have to be put through three passes. (Chap 4: 2,326 words)
Chapter 4 (aka6) hasn’t been written at all. It needs the full specks done. But I know, at least, what needs to go in there, so it’s just a matter of putting what’s in my head on paper. (Chap 5: 3,178words)
[okay, so… this was set up to hold the whole books re-write, but since then I decided to split it up (‘cause I didn’t finish it in a fortnight), see next week for the continuation]
So that’s what a re-read of one of my books turns out like. Though normally I have already finished the whole book and that means that I do grammar a little and fix up just random lines. But this is one from a not finished book. And it will probably work out better for me because now I have a list and point form of what needs to happen while I re-write, rather than having to go back and forth like I normally do.
So let’s see how I can do this right? Let’s make my dad proud of me (not that he isn’t, or that he’s ridding me or anything, my parents are real supportive. He just wants me to do what I perch)!!!

Sat: re-did the start of Forever with my Werewolf (Moonlit Wolves #2), I decided that I liked not having a run up to the story, rather starting it were it hits. The good thing is that I’ll still be able to use the crap that I wrote just different context and part. (650 words)

Mon: [this is a bitch about the world because of the LGBT community be advised of this before you read. There are some issues that are only my sided, and I have a tendersy to talk before I think of what my words mean and who they could hurt. I don’t care for the most part but you might and so if you’re easily offended then please skip to the next day]

I honestly can’t believe the world that we live in!  Yeah, this should be something to really rant about. To scream and shout out to the entire world. And yeah I would, but I’m not at that point in my blogging life. also, this isn’t really a rant, mostly because, well, I just not going to go there. I’m not polite enough. Not savvy and I tend to insult people when I don’t mean to because I’m not sensitive enough to their feelings.
But why do people care so much about others? Why is fucking one person or the other really an issue? Why can’t they just leave well enough alone?
Why is homosexuality still a thing? Why isn’t it just some person who liked to fuck the same sex? What’s the big deal surrounding them? They are great and they have even better stories to tell then us hetro’s really. We are, same in same out, our problems are mundane....oh, wait, so are there’s! So why are they looked at like they shouldn’t exits. Why are there fetishes, their sexuality and the lifestyle shunned upon when it’s no were near as fucked up as hetro’s can be—wait, there’s another one,  it is, because at the end of the day they are people just like you and me. and we should all look at (okay this is for the transgender or transvestites of the world) with awe, or jealousy, because they are showing the world who they are and they are brave enough to do that even when there are fucked up people out there who want to put there noises in other business just to make their boring as fuck lives seem interesting.
It isn’t. You aren’t. And they will get over it in a blink of an eye and keep on doing what they are doing. Hell, it if were me, I’d flaunt it even more!!
Sorry but it’s true.
[This bitch comes curtsey of agreeing with Stephani Hecht. The bitch is swell and right on point. Also, I didn’t know homosexuals can’t give blood, is that something that happens over here (Australia), all around the world? ‘Cause really that’s fucked up. Hell, we need blood, lots of the shit and we aren’t giving it enough. As long as it’s tested (ha, it is, funny that) then what’s the point. Really, it’s not like you can catch gay, really, you can’t. And it’s not like the people you are putting it in even know who it’s coming from, and then really who cares as long as it’s clean, right.]

You what to know the sad thing in all this, though. It’s that I’ve never even thought about it. I read Hecht’s posting and she had a point, a point that I hadn’t even thought about. Maybe subconcisely I have, but my m/m stories hadn’t got anything to do with the world. And I’m not talking about my Moonlit Wolves series either, that one will have that type of crap in it eventually, because that’s what the stories will need. But I’m only up to book 3 and those ones aren’t going to be around communities in general.
Moving on.
I’m also talking about in my Warrior Brethren series as well, that on has a gay couple, a lesbian couple, a couple were ones a transvestite (though they are a hetro coupling, so....) but they are, actually I think one will swing more towards hateful family, but they aren’t really to do with everyday life as it is.
Still, it’s made me think. I just really don’t see a difference in any coupling. Just the story they can bring to the table. And it’s an everyday thing to, I just don’t care. Not about whom people love.
I care about people using other people’s lives to cover up their own homophobia. Seriously if you have it, say something. People need to know that shit. I think that’s more a transmitted dieses than anything else in the world.

It reminds me of a Big Brother house mate (back in the day, when it was still on channel 10—that show just doesn’t last long in Australia.) there were two guys and they kissed, I forget the reasoning behind the kiss, though I do know it was for a reason, a gag or dare or a ‘well I’ll show you’ kind of thing. I’m not sure the reason, but it was funny.
And not the point.
Still, this chick roommate starts having a hug scene about it. (Another did too, but he flat out said it was because of homophobia, religiousness or something) anyway, back to the chick. She had a huge meltdown about it. and instead of just simply saying ‘I don’t like that, it’s...blar, blar,” she went on about how she just recently learnt that one of her ex’s from high school had just come out as gay. And it emotionally scarred her.
I’ll give you some points about her to show you how fucked up the point is shall I
1. She was in her late twenties; the guy in question was in his 30’s, so that late for her.
2. It was when she was 16yrs old. They had different lives and shit like that. Because they had broken up when they were in high school!
3. She made a point in trying to say that it was her fault. That she felt she turned him.
Let’s reflect on that one by reading point 1 & 2 again, If not by thinking like someone who doesn’t believe that 12th century line.

My only boyfriend in high school told the world that he was gay less than a month after we broke up. The only thing that pissed me off about this was that he didn’t tell me. Like he thought I would care. I was insulted big time. Like I gave a shit. Hell, I told everyone that I turned him, just because of the hilariousness of the thing. Like he wasn’t already gay. If anything, I just helped him understand himself better and feel more comfortable about opening up to the world. I’m honoured about that fact. I really cared for him, as a friend, that we had been for four years before that, and I am now, as I was then, proud that I could help him, I just wish he’d trusted me enough to let me be there for him more than what I was, since I didn’t know for ages afterward (okay I did, but it was all meant to be a big shhh...)
Okay, so that’s a little more about me than you needed to know, so I’m going to go now and... um...write something, somewhere else.

What a fucking moronic bitch that house mate was right? The best thing about it all was that the rest of the house ripped into both her and the other guy, but more so her for what she said. About how fucked up she was and that she couldn’t have been scared her whole life when it was only a recent thing on his part. Like she had a right to a sliver of his person and his reasoning’s.
Anyway, I’ve forgotten my point now. Sorry, and, well.....

Chapter 2 –done
Chapter 1 (3), added in (so first written) 1,135 words –done
Chapter 2 (4)—done: made into two chapters, so... {Check above for dets}
Paste in the first half of chap 4!!!

Tue: oh, yes, in a series context when all your characters are near and dear to the story, it’s so much more helpful to know what’s happening in their story. Where they need to be beforehand. And more importantly to have their full personality behind you when you’re writing them in. Even if the only have a line or too. Mostly it’s good because with that one line you can throw in them.

Wed: Okay, back to the above topic (you know, Mondays talk), well I asked a friend if Australia had a thing on not taking gay blood. Mostly I asked because both his parents are nurses and he would have a higher knowledge of these things.—he didn’t really. But he didn’t think that we did. So, ask, is there a problem with that here??

Hum...I’m also finding it a little hard to write. I think this is because I’m not sleeping well, which is a result of family sickness. I’m a little heavier of head fluid but not noticeable, my kids are hitting fevers and vomiting, which keeps you up—it’s not like you cannot help them out. Right?
That and I’m also finding it a little hard to figure out the worlds, the places, and the emotions to finish off this chapter. It’s like, I have it all in my head, but it doesn’t want to come out. Like what’s there isn’t good enough so my brain won’t let it sit there. Which means I can’t move on.
And it’s really crap, because all I have to do it write a way for them to quickly get out of this fight. I can even cop out and do it that they got scared because of her magic. Easy, it’s not a plot point for this story at all, but it’s needed for a story down the line.
—ha, that’s it, a cop out. Fuck your good. Thanks.

Chapter 4: 1,638 new words

Thur: I think my chapters are too short?!
I started; chapter 5 with 814 words
Next week will be easier (or I’ll actually do more), since NSW Sept-Oct holidays starts up this weekend. 2 weeks with a house full of kids. Yeah!, yeah, I’m withering a little. But at least it’s only one full week with both kids, and they are really good, letting me sleep in and all that. Plus we’re getting a new car, so we could have a nice drive. That two and I promised I would take them to see Monsters Hotel, ‘cause my son laughs at the ‘screaming pie’ skit in the ads.

I re-did my ME page!
Later tonight: Forever with my Werewolf (Moonlit Wolves #2), 1,827 words

Fri: Forever with my Werewolf (Moonlit Wolves #2), 869 words
Sat: went to the movies tonight: we saw The Watch with my sister last night; it was good, better than I thought it would be, but now I have to watch the English on this movie came from (sorry I’ve actually forgotten what it’s named). It’s a movie that has some parts that I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget.

Sun: Forever with my Werewolf (Moonlit Wolves #2), 1,317 words
Mon: NSW, Australia school holidays officially starts today, yay. Though if you’re a kid, and it’s your holidays, it started Fir avo, but I ain’t, and today a day they were meant to go, but aren’t because of holidays.

Forever with my Werewolf (Moonlit Wolves #2), 960 words

Tue: I’m sick, head cold, the worst of the worst, because you aren’t completely crapped out, only enough to make life a little more difficult then what it would be if you were healthy. That too, and they last for-fucking-ever.
Not only that, but my wisdom tooth decided that it wanted another bit for freedom, lucky that I am, the thing seems like it actually fits, and that it’s coming in straight enough for me not to have to worry, but my face feels (doesn’t look it) like it’s twice the size and one half of my tongue is numb. I really feel for babies at the moment. Let’s face it, I’m only dealing with one, they have to push out a whole mouth full.

Chap 4 (aka6—aka 5): 1,477words) — A conversational informational dumping. I hate this but it’s kinda needed. I hate it, I really do, but it’s needed, sorry in advance.

Wed: Yeah, finished Chapter Four (aka 6—aka five)
Onto chapter....shit, by what I’m working on, it’s 6: it’s another hard on, which was the reason that I hadn’t written it in the first place, but, what’ll you do but push on threw.
            Wrote 1,124 words, but that’s it, I tried, truly, but Chap 6 just isn’t on my finger tips at the moment.

Thur: I think I’m pushing the wolf to much in this story, like I’m pushing him or something. I’m also having problems in thinking that I’m writing to many mundane sentences and conversations into it. But it’s also about her learning she’s safe around all of them, and I’m trying to put them together in normal spots, where they can learn about each other.
Still, I’m having this problem thinking I’m not doing a good enough job at the story because I’m going doing it too much.
Though I can’t seem to stop.
Chapter five (aka 7—aka 6) word count for today: 774

Weekly Re-cap: I’m not sure if it’s ‘cause the kids are home or because of my dad, but man I’ve written a lot this fortnight.

Ending Paragraph
How much was it going to be when he pulled an orgasm out of her? If this was the reaction he gave just to have her laugh at him so much she cried?
Body of Darkness (WB1) page 32

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